This page contains transcriptions of our comix for text searching purposes. These are not descriptions for the visually impaired (those can be found elsewhere).
| CATALOG NUMBER | PAGE | DESCRIPTION | |
|---|---|---|---|
| MF001 | 01 | Cover. MF logo at top. Imp paints an ensō (Zen calligraphy circle). Background of waves. Corner box w/ number, price (free), icon of M, lonely place PRODUCTIONS. | |
| MF001 | 02 | M bows to cushion | |
| MF001 | 03 | I: OH WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO IT “RIGHT”? | |
| MF001 | 04 | I: (leaning on elbow) OH, YOU'RE JUDGING OTHER PEOPLE? OH, YOU'RE JUDGING YOURSELF? HOW BORING! | |
| MF001 | 05 | M: (weeps)
I: This again? |
|
| MF001 | 06 | M: (thinking) THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK
I: (beneath thought balloon, holding hands up to avoid being crushed) ENOUGH ALREADY! |
|
| MF001 | 07 | I pokes M's empty thought bubble with a needle | |
| MF001 | 08 | Clouds have parted revealing the face of the moon.
I: (looking up) YOU'RE MISISNG IT |
|
| MF001 | 09 | M eyes wide, line of surprise over head. Bubble popping symbol (squean) inside his thought bubble.
From off-panel: DIIINGG… I: POOF |
|
| MF001 | 10 | M: ANOTHER CHANCE TO BE IMPERFECT
I: (rolling their eyes) ENJOY IT |
|
| MF001 | 11 | I: LET GO!
M: (cringing) OF WHAT?!! |
|
| MF001 | 12 | I: I DON'T KNOW WHAT “NONTHINKING” IS BUT YOU AINT DOING IT
M: THINKING OR NOT, I'M SITTING THAT'S ALL |
|
| MF001 | 13 | I: (into bullhorn) RELAX!!
M vibrates, eyes wide, mouth jagged |
|
| MF001 | 14 | M: (pain stars, plewd (sweat bead), spirals for eyes) (thinking): WHY WON'T THAT [FUCK]ING BELL RING?
I holds keisu (bell) and mallet |
|
| MF001 | 15 | I meditates next to M, off kilter with halo | |
| MF001 | 16 | I: (walking away with a wave of their hand) ALRITE, YOU WORE ME OUT ALREADY
M: TOOK LONG ENUF |
|
| MF001 | 17 | M: (alone, eyes fully open): NOW WHO WILL DISTRACT ME? | |
| MF001 | 18 | I: (holding up their hands) SHEESH! NOBODY'S LOOKING AT YOU! | |
| MF001 | 19 | I: (curled up, eyes closed): Zzzzz
M: (wide awake) |
|
| MF001 | 20 | From off-panel: WOOF WOOF
TWEET TWEET TALK TALK I, eyes half lidded, holds up a pistol. |
|
| MF001 | 21 | I, with gritted teeth, tosses a brick, striking M's head.
SFX: ZIP POW M: (heart next to head) Krazy Kat homage obviously. |
|
| MF001 | 22 | M: (thought bubble) [music notes]
I: (grinning) YOU DON'T EVEN LIKE THAT SONG |
|
| MF001 | 23 | M and I bow to each other
Caption: MEDITATOR: HE/HIM IMP: THEY/THEM —Ed. |
|
| MF001 | 24 | Back cover.
Text: MEDITATION FUNNIES #1 ©MMXX BY M. Elias Hiebert eliashiebert@comcast.net GRAM: @eliashiebert BIRDIE: @eliashiebert A lonely place PRODUCTION P.O. BOX 200394 DENVER, CO 80220 D.S.S.M.M.I. |
|
| MF002 | 01 | Cover. MF logo. M is pierced by an arrow. Face contorted South Park style ( >< ).
I: (poised to shoot another arrow): SECOND ISSUE! Corner box w/ number, price (free), icon of M, lonely place PRODUCTIONS |
|
| MF002 | 02 | M bows to cushion. | |
| MF002 | 03 | I: (rolling their eyes) IS YOUR PRACTICE “RIPENING”? | |
| MF002 | 04 | I: YOU HATE IT
M: I DO IT ANYWAY I: YOU LOVE IT M: I AVOID IT ANYWAY |
|
| MF002 | 05 | I tickles M's nose with a feather. | |
| MF002 | 06 | I: YOU HAVE PLENTY OF TIME TO THINK ABOUT YOUR FAILURES
M: I DON'T HAVE TO |
|
| MF002 | 07 | I: WHERE WERE YOU YESTERDAY?
M: (cringes) |
|
| MF002 | 08 | M: WHERE WERE YOU YESTERDAY?
I: (shrugs) |
|
| MF002 | 09 | M: (thought balloon) [crossed pieces of tape saying CENSORED, 4 plewds (sweat beads)]
I: OOH THAT'LL BE A TUFF ONE TO IGNORE |
|
| MF002 | 10 | M: (a fermata inside a speech balloon
I: LISTEN TO YOUR EARS RING |
|
| MF002 | 11 | Text: GOODBYE TO THE MAYU SANCTUARY[,] DENVER COLORADO [,] CLOSED FOR GOOD IN 2020 DURING THE CORONAVIRUS PANDEMIC[,] WHERE I FIRST SAT ZAZEN WITH OTHER PEOPLE[,] WHERE I BOUGHT THE CUSHION I STIL USE TODAY
Cushion. |
|
| MF002 | 12 | 2-page spread. M: 11 connected thought bubbles. Last one has a tail leading off-panel.
1, 2, 3: All filled with jagged lines 4: Bubble popping symbol (squean) 5, 6, 7: Empty 8: Jagged lines start to reappear from edges of thought bubble 9: Jagged lines get longer 10, 11: Jagged lines fill the bubbles again I: AND SO ON |
|
| MF002 | 13 | (same spread) | |
| MF002 | 14 | Cityscape on fire.
M: NO HOPE VIOLENCE I: NO HOPE NONVIOLENCE |
|
| MF002 | 15 | Cityscape on fire.
M: REVOLUTION PLEASE I: HOW CAN YOU CALL FOR REVOLUTION WHEN YOU'RE TOO SCARED TO PICK UP A GUN YOURSELF? |
|
| MF002 | 16 | I: ARE WE GOING TO ADDRESS THE FACT THAT YOU LOOK LIKE A COCK & BALLS?
M: THERE'S AN OLD TRADITION OF COMIC FIGURES SPORTING PHALLIC SYMBOLS[.] THE LONG NOSE, THE LONG HAT[,] ETC |
|
| MF002 | 17 | I: ARE WE GOING TO ADDRESS THE FACT THAT YOU LOOK LIKE A COCK & BALLS?
M: I THINK I LOOK MORE LIKE A FLYING V GUITAR I: LIKE I SAID |
|
| MF002 | 18 | M: WHERE IS REALITY?
I: TAKE IT EASY, THESE ARE GAG CARTOONS[,] NOT KOAN! |
|
| MF002 | 19 | M: (face contorted South Park style { >< ), pain star)
I: (doing a pancake stretch) DID YOU STREEETCH? |
|
| MF002 | 20 | M: (thought bubble) THOUGHT THOUGHT THOUGHT
I is up on a ladder picking the THOUGHTs out of the thought balloon and putting them into a bucket. |
|
| MF002 | 21 | I and M: (Xes for eyes (crottles)): Zzz | |
| MF002 | 22 | M and I bow to each other. | |
| MF002 | 23 | Text: M. ELIAS HIEBERT IS A FATHER, A WAGE WORKER AND A PRETEND CARTOONIST. HIS MIXTAPES ARE AVAILABLE FROM SATURATED FAT TAPES. INQUIRE BY EMAIL OR POST
MEDITATION FUNNIES IS PRODUCED WITH HELP FROM THE DR. STEPHEN SANDERS MEMORIAL METAPHYSICAL INSTITUTE |
|
| MF002 | 24 | Back cover.
Text: MEDITATION FUNNIES #2 ©MMXXI By M. Elias Hiebert eliashiebert@comcast.net GRAM: @eliashiebert BIRDIE: @eliashiebert A lonely place PRODUCTION P.O. BOX 200394 DENVER, CO 80220 T.D.S.S.M.M.I. |
|
| MF003 | 01 | Cover. MF logo. I sits zazen on top of M's head. Corner box w/ number, price (free), icon of M, lonely place PRODUCTIONS | |
| MF003 | 02 | Epigraph from Ānāpānasati Sutta (“A monk, o Monks, goes into a forest, or to the foot of a great tree, or to a lonely place, and there sits down, cross-legged, holding his body upright, and practices Introspection. “He breathes in attentively, and attentively breathes out. Drawing in a long breath, he knows: ‘I drawing in a long breath,’ exhaling a long breath, he knows: ‘I am exhaling a long breath.’ Drawing in a short breath, he knows: ‘I am drawing in a short breath,’ exhaling a short breath, he knows: ‘I am exhaling a short breath.’) | |
| MF003 | 03 | I: ARE YOU EARNING “MERIT”? | |
| MF003 | 04 | I: DON'T THINK ABOUT SALIVA!
M: GULP (word balloon comes from throat) |
|
| MF003 | 05 | Caption: SIT UPRIGHT AS IF AN INVISIBLE STRING WERE ATTACHED TO THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD
Line runs from M's head to top of panel. I (eyes half lidded) holds scissors. |
|
| MF003 | 06 | M has jagged mouth and twitch lines (agitrons) around nose and various other body parts.
I: (scratching back with back scratcher) AHHHHHHH Onomatopoeia: SCRATCH SCRATCH |
|
| MF003 | 07 | I: ARE YOU HAVING A JOYRIDE OR A HELLRIDE? | |
| MF003 | 08 | I: Oooo THAT'S A GOOD THOUGHT[.] BETTER REMEMBER IT | |
| MF003 | 09 | I: YOU REALLY THINK YOU CAN WATCH YOUR BREATH WITHOUT CONTROLLING IT? YOU REALLY THINK YOU CAN WATCH YOUR THOUGHTS WITHOUT FEEDING THEM?
M: YOU REALLY THINK YOU CAN KISS MY ASS WITHOUT SMELLING IT? |
|
| MF003 | 10 | M: (balloon coming from stomach) GURGLE
Other meditator (in shadow) (word balloon coming from stomach): GURGLE I: THEY'RE TALKING TO EACH OTHER [Edited to add masks] |
|
| MF003 | 11 | M (balloon coming from stomach): GURGLE
I (rolling their eyes): JEEZ, HAVE A SNACK NEXT TIME |
|
| MF003 | 12 | Top caption: (large) I BROKE MY FOOT MEDITATING!
Foot bones, one broken with pain star. Bottom caption: WHEN THEY TELL YOU TO BE CAREFUL STANDING UP, THEY MEAN IT! |
|
| MF003 | 13 | Cap: MY FOOT FELL ASLEEP LIKE IT USUALLY DOES WHEN I'M SITTING
M has one eye closed, one eye open. M's foot: ZZZZZZ Cap: NOT REALIZING IT WAS STILL BENT SIDEWAYS I TRIED TO STAND ON IT AND… Top view of two feet, one on its bottom like normal and the other on its side. Emenata from the foot on its side. Onomatopoeia: KEERAK!! Cap: I HAD TO MEDITATE IN A CHAIR FOR A WHILE AFTER THAT M in chair with pain star from foot Extra cap on side of panel: PS IT'S OKAY NOW PPS BE CAREFUL! |
|
| MF003 | 14 | SFT ad.
Typed text: (spaced out) saturated fat tapes Scan here for mixtapes. QR code. Typed text: Or inquire by email or post to the address on the bsck of this magazine. |
|
| MF003 | 15 | M: (thinking) I CLEAR MY THOUGHTS AWAY AND THERE ARE MORE THOUGHTS UNDERNEATH
I: WHAT'S UNDER THAT? |
|
| MF003 | 16 | Cartoonist: I WANT TO DO FOR MEDITATION WHAT HARRY MAYEROVITCH DID FOR DEATH
I: OR KLIBAN DID FOR CATS? C: LET'S NOT GO OVERBOARD Pencil with USA. |
|
| MF003 | 17 | I: WHY DON'T YOU DRAW THE MUDRA?
C: YOU KNOW HANDS ARE HARD USA pencil. |
|
| MF003 | 18 | I: WHEN YOU DO THE CHARACTERS-TALKING-TO-THE-ARTIST THING, YOU KNOW YOU'RE LOW ON IDEAS
C: AND IT'S ONLY THE THIRD ISSUE! M: (thinking) META META USA pencil. |
|
| MF003 | 19 | I: (finger to mouth) SHH
M: YOU SHH |
|
| MF003 | 20 | M: AT LAST SOME CLARITY
I: I SEE RIGHT THRU IT |
|
| MF003 | 21 | I: STOP THINKING OF MATERIAL FOR US! […]YOU GOT ANY? | |
| MF003 | 22 | M & I kinhin | |
| MF003 | 23 | TEXT: M. ELIAS HIEBERT WANTS TO DRAW LIKE MILT GROSS, JAMES THURBER, GEO. HERRIMAN, SIDNEY SMITH AND JOHN PORCELLINO BUT HE'LL HAVE TO SETTLE FOR DRAWING LIKE HIMSELF
MEDITATION FUNNIES IS PRODUCED WITH THE GENEROUS HELP OF THE DR STEPHEN SANDERS MEMORIAL METAPHYSICAL INSTITUTE |
|
| MF003 | 24 | TEXT: MEDITATION FUNNIES #3 ©MMXXI By M. Elias Hiebert
eliashiebert@comcast.net GRAM: @eliashiebert BIRDIE: @eliashiebert A lonely place PRODUCTION PO BOX 200394 DENVER, CO 80220 |
|
| MF004 | 01 | Cover. MF logo. Corner box w/ number, price (free), M icon, lonely place PRODUCTIONS.
CONTENT NOTE: SUICIDE. One eye closed, I holds a T-square and plumbline next to M. |
|
| MF004 | 02 | Epigraph from Ānāpānasati Sutta (“A monk, o Monks, goes into a forest, or to the foot of a great tree, or to a lonely place, and there sits down, cross-legged, holding his body upright, and practices Introspection. “He breathes in attentively, and attentively breathes out. Drawing in a long breath, he knows: ‘I drawing in a long breath,’ exhaling a long breath, he knows: ‘I am exhaling a long breath.’ Drawing in a short breath, he knows: ‘I am drawing in a short breath,’ exhaling a short breath, he knows: ‘I am exhaling a short breath.’) | |
| MF004 | 03 | I: YOU'RE TRYING… | |
| MF004 | 04 | I: (looking around) WHY DO YOU LIKE IT HERE?
M: I KNOW WHAT TO DO AND I DON'T HAVE TO TALK TO ANYBODY |
|
| MF004 | 05 | I: (pointing) SOMEBODY MOVED! | |
| MF004 | 06 | M: (gassho)
I: (tongue out, winds up with the stick) |
|
| MF004 | 07 | I: ISN'T THERE SOMETHING BETTER YOU COULD
BE DOING? M: NOTHING I KNOW OF |
|
| MF004 | 08 | I: CAREFUL, DON'T GET “ENLIGHTENED”[.] I HEAR THAT CAN HAPPEN | |
| MF004 | 09 | The word THOUGHT is repeated around the perimeter of M's body.
I: YOU'RE SURROUNDED |
|
| MF004 | 10 | The word THOUGHT, repeated, forms waves.
M's head and shoulders are above the waves. I: (floating by in a boat) DON'T DROWN |
|
| MF004 | 11 | I sweeps out M's thought balloon. The letters of the word THOUGHT fly around. | |
| MF004 | 12 | I: EVERYTHING YOU DO IS SILLY, MISGUIDED AND FRUITLESS
M: THAT'S WHAT LIFE IS FOR[.] BESIDES[,] I ENJOY IT |
|
| MF004 | 13 | I: (looking around) …WHEN THERE'S REAL WORK TO BE DONE
M: I HELP SOMETIMES[.] WHAT MORE CAN YOU ASK OF A HUMAN? WE CAN'T ALL BE HEROES |
|
| MF004 | 14 | SFT ad.
Typed text: saturated fat tapes [spaced out] Scan here for mixtapes. QR code. Typed text: Or inquire by email or post to the address on the back of this magazine. password: hoaryhandsofhoggoth [upside down] |
|
| MF004 | 15 | M & I (I looking down) both thinking of a skull. | |
| MF004 | 16 | Inside M's thought bubble, a knife, a gun, a bomb, an ax, a couple scribbles.
I: IF YOU MUST DISTRACT YOURSELF, WHY NOT DISTRACT YOURSELF WITH SOMETHING NICE? |
|
| MF004 | 17 | I: HOW CAN ANYONE STAND TO BE HUMAN?
M: THAT'S WHAT I'M PRACTICING |
|
| MF004 | 18 | I: WHY DO YOU WANT TO BE AN ANGEL?
M: ANGELS HAVE TO BE GOOD[.] THEY HAVE NO CHOICE Typed text: This statement may not be theologically sound.—Ed. |
|
| MF004 | 19 | I: YOU HAVN'T THOUGHT ABOUT KILLING YOURSELF LATELY
M: IT'S ENUF TO KNOW I'LL DIE EVENTUALLY I: ARE YOU SURE DEATH IS THE END? M: SHIT |
|
| MF004 | 20 | M: I FEEL LIKE I'M NOT QUEER ENUF TO CALL MYSELF QUEER[,] NOT AUTISTIC ENUF TO CALL MYSELF AUTISTIC[,] NOT BUDDHIST ENUF TO CALL MYSELF A BUDDHIST
I: YOU JUST DON'T WANT TO COMMIT TO AN IDENTITY[,] ESPECIALLY A DIFFICULT ONE |
|
| MF004 | 21 | I: NO ONE IS EVER GOING TO CONGRATULATE YOU FOR HOW WELL YOU SAT
M: THAT ISN'T WHAT I COME HERE FOR (thinking) BUT IT WOULD BE NICE |
|
| MF004 | 22 | Cap: IF YOU HAVENT' YET[,] PLEASE GET A COVID VACCINE
M & I both have needles stuck in their arms. |
|
| MF004 | 23 | M & I bow to each other. | |
| MF004 | 24 | Text: MEDITATION FUNNIES #4 ©MMXXI by M. Elias Hiebert
eliashiebert@ocmcast.net GRAM: @eliashiebert BIRDIE: @eliashiebert A lonely place PRODUCTION PO BOX 200394 DENVER, CO 80220 (upside down) T.D.S.S.M.M.I. |
|
| MF005 | 01 | Cover. MF logo. M as a skeleton. Corner box w/ number, price (free), lonely place PRODUCTIONS | |
| MF005 | 02 | M bows to cushion. | |
| MF005 | 03 | I: DON'T GET COMFORTABLE | |
| MF005 | 04 | I: ARE YOU TRYING TO REALIZE YOU'RE A BUDDHA?
M: I'M TRYING TO REALIZE I'M SITTING HERE |
|
| MF005 | 05 | M: I FELT SO IGNORANT TALKING TO THE ROSHI
I: (shrugging) WELL TEACHING THE IGNORANT IS THEIR GIG, RIGHT? |
|
| MF005 | 06 | M is flanked by other meditators, in shadow. I appears on a laptop.
M: IT'S LOVELY TO SHARE THE SAME SPACE WITH OTHER PEOPLE I: IT'S NOT THE SAME ON ZOOM Edited to add a mask. |
|
| MF005 | 07 | M is flanked by other meditators, in shadow.
M: I GET AWFULLY SELF-IMPORTANT WHEN I SIT ALONE I: WHEN YOU SIT WITH PEOPLE YOU REALIZE YOU'RE JUST ANOTHER BOZO M: YOU'RE THE CLOWN Edited to add masks. |
|
| MF005 | 08 | M is flanked by other meditators, in shadow.
M: SUCH A JOY TO SIT WITH OTHER PEOPLE I: YOU DON'T EVEN LIKE PEOPLE M: I LIKE PEOPLE[,] I JUST GET CRUSHING BRAIN PAIN WHENEVER I TALK TO THEM Edited to add masks. |
|
| MF005 | 09 | I: EVERYWHERE YOU GO THERE'S SOMEONE THERE TO TELL YOU YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG | |
| MF005 | 10 | I: ENDURE IT | |
| MF005 | 11 | I: ISN'T IT GREAT WHEN OTHER PEOPLE FIGIT? THEN YOU CAN FEEL SUPERIOR TO THEM | |
| MF005 | 12 | Pages 12 and 13 make up a 2-page spread.
M: WHAT IS GOD? I: THAT THING IN THE DARK YOU'RE AFRAID OF I's word balloon is connected to the word balloon on the next page. |
|
| MF005 | 13 | Pages 12 and 13 make up a 2-page spread.
I's word balloon is connected to the word balloon on the previous page. I: AND GOD IS ALWAYS THERE M: SO I MAY AS WELL NOT BE AFRAID OF THE DARK |
|
| MF005 | 14 | The cushion is empty.
I: (pointing off-panel with their thumb) HE HAD TO GO POOP |
|
| MF005 | 15 | C: WHEN YOU LETTER BY HAND YOU HAVE TO SPELLCHECK BY HAND
M: AND YOU NEVER DO USA pencil. |
|
| MF005 | 16 | M: WHAT'S WITH YOUR HORNS?
I: (looking up, with their hand behind their horn) GOT EM AT THE SPIRIT STORE M: AND THE DRESS? I: I MADE IT OUT OF LINUS'S SHIRT |
|
| MF005 | 17 | M: HOW ABOUT THE GLOVES?
I: (hands extended) A CARTOON TROPE WITH A NASTY HISTORY[.] I NEED THEM 'CAUSE I DON'T HAVE HANDS[.] JUST GLOVES Cap: (upside down) DID I STEAL THIS GAG FROM LIKE MILK & CHEESE OR SOMETHING? |
|
| MF005 | 18 | I: THIS ISN'T SUPPOSED TO BE THERAPY | |
| MF005 | 19 | I: POSER
M: YOU SPELL THAT RIGHT? |
|
| MF005 | 20 | M: (slumped) (thinking) I CAN'T DO IT
I: SLUMP |
|
| MF005 | 21 | I: HOW IS IT IN THAT RICKETY OLD HEAD?
M: CRAMPED. |
|
| MF005 | 22 | M & I bow to each other. | |
| MF005 | 23 | Text: M. ELIAS HIEBERT's MIX TAPES ARE AVAILABLE FROM SATURATED FAT TAPES.
INQUIRE BY EMAIL OR POST. MEDITATION FUNNIES IS PRODUCED WITH THE GENEROUS HELP OF THE DOCTOR STEPHEN SANDERS MEMORIAL METAPHYSICAL INSTITUTE |
|
| MF005 | 24 | Text: MEDITATION FUNNIES #5
©MMXXI by M. Elias Hiebert eliashiebert@comcast.net GRAM: @eliashiebert BIRDIE: @eliashiebert A lonely place PRODUCTION PO BOX 200394 DENVER CO 80220 |
|
| MF006 | 01 | Cover. MF logo. M is tipped onto his side. Corner box w/ icon of M, number, date (JAN-FEB), price (FREE), lonely place PRODUCTIONS. CONTENT NOTE: DEPRESSION & SUICIDE (BRIEF MENTION) | |
| MF006 | 02 | M bows to cushion.
©MMXXII by M. Elias Hiebert A lonely place PRODUCTION P.O. BOX 200394 / DENVER, CO 80220 |
|
| MF006 | 03 | M: (thinking) REMEMBER TO BUY EGGS | |
| MF006 | 04 | M: WHEN YOU DO ZAZEN THE WHOLE UNIVERSE DOES ZAZEN WITH YOU
I: EVERY SPINNING PARTICLE SITS ON ITS CUSHION |
|
| MF006 | 05 | M: I READ ABOUT PEOPLE'S ENLIGHTENMENT EXPERIENCES AND IT JUST SOUNDS LIKE A NASTY DRUG TRIP
I: MAYBE THAT'S BECAUSE THAT'S ALL YOU HAVE TO COMPARE IT TO |
|
| MF006 | 06 | I: WHY IS IT CALLED “MEDITATION FUNNIES”?
M: BECAUSE PEOPLE DON'T KNOW WHAT “ZAZEN” MEANS I: SO YOU'D RATHER PEOPLE HAVE THE WRONG IDEA THAN NO IDEA? |
|
| MF006 | 07 | I: WHY NOT “ZEN FUNNIES”?
M: THEN PEOPLE REALLY WOULD HAVE GOTTEN THE WRONG IDEA |
|
| MF006 | 08 | I: WHAT DOES YOUR TEACHER SAY?
M: KEEP DOING THIS |
|
| MF006 | 09 | Unconnected thought bubble: THOUGHT THOUGHT THOUGHT THOUGHT THOUGHT THOUGHT
I: (pointing) IF YOU'RE NOT THINKING THOSE, WHO IS? |
|
| MF006 | 10 | M: FORGOT TO BRING MY CUSHION ON THIS TRIP[.] I'M SITTING ON A ROLLED UP TOWEL[.] I HAVE TO PAY MORE ATTENTION TO MY POSTURE[,] WHICH IS GOOD
I: AND YOUR BUTT HURTS WHICH IS EVEN BETTER |
|
| MF006 | 11 | Cap: SITTING IN THE HOTEL WEIGHT ROOM IN THE EARLY MORNING[,] HOPING I DON'T STARTLE SOMEBODY WHO WALKS IN | |
| MF006 | 12 | Pages 12 & 13 make a 2-page spread. M thinking of M thinking of M thinking of M thinking of M thinking… | |
| MF006 | 13 | 2-page spread with page 12 | |
| MF006 | 14 | SFT ad.
Text: (bubble letters) S.F.T. Text: NEW MIXTAPE AVAILABLE NOW! Typed text: tinyurl.com/fattapes QR code Typed text: (upside down) password: hoaryhandsofhoggoth |
|
| MF006 | 15 | I: YOU USED TO SAY YOU WANTED “MEANING”
M: I MEANT I WANTED A REASON TO LIVE |
|
| MF006 | 16 | I: YOU USED TO SAY YOU WANTED “MEANING”
M: I MEANT I DIDN'T WANT TO BE DEPRESSED ANYMORE |
|
| MF006 | 17 | M: I LOOKED & LOOKED FOR MEANING UNTIL I ENCOUNTERED JP SARTRE, WHO SAID
Floating head of JP Sartre: (smoking pipe) FUCK YOU! MAKE YOUR OWN! I smokes pipe; eyes cross looking at pipe. Cap: IF YOU'RE A SUICIDAL TEENAGER LIKE I WAS, MAYBE READ NAUSEA[.] YMMV! |
|
| MF006 | 18 | M: I'VE ALWAYS SEARCHED FOR SOMETHING THAT WILL MAKE THE WORLD MAKE SENSE
I: WHAT YOU NEED TO DO IS GET COMFORTABLE LIVING IN A WORLD THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE |
|
| MF006 | 19 | M: I AM THE BREATHING APPARATUS OF THE UNIVERSE
I: BLOWHARD |
|
| MF006 | 20 | I forces bellows up M's nose. | |
| MF006 | 21 | I reads newspaper, legs crossed.
Banner: Daily Headline: WARS Subhead: RUMORS OF WARS |
|
| MF006 | 22 | M & I bow to each other. | |
| MF006 | 23 | Text: SHOUT OUTS: …/& H.R. Meininger/
THE NICE PEOPLE AT POSTAL CENTERS USA IN MAYFAIR • MY DEAD MOM'S PAPER CUTTER • THE DOCTOR STEPHEN SANDERS MEMORIAL METAPHYSICAL INSTITUTE • ANYONE WHO WRITES ME BACK • ZEN CENTERS EVERYWHERE • DICK BLICK • ❤JEN️❤ • MONTCLAIR STATION 80220 • KIIP DEVELOPMENT & JOHN DE WEERDT FOR THE TIMER • THE LAUNDRY ROOM AT THE RAMADA INN IN SALINA KS • SATURATED FAT TAPES • SATURN COMIX • EAGLE SHIP |
|
| MF006 | 24 | Text: MeditationFunnies@gmail.com
instagram.com/MeditationFunnies twitter.com/MeditationComix (DANG CHARACTER LIMIT!) fb.me/MeditationFunnies THIS MAGAZINE IS ALWAYS FREE BUT IF YOU WISH YOU MAY DONATE AT: ko-fi.com/MeditationFunnies |
|
| MF007 | 01 | Cover. M pulls on a rope tied to I's horn. MF logo. Corner box w/ number, date (MAR-APR), price (FREE), M icon, lonely place PRODUCTIONS | |
| MF007 | 02 | M bows to cushion.
Text: ©MMXXII by M. Elias Hiebert A lonely place PRODUCTION PO BOX 200394 / DENVER CO 80220 |
|
| MF007 | 03 | I: IS IT GETTING STALE? | |
| MF007 | 04 | I: WHY YOU HAVE TO TALK YOURSELF INTO THIS EVERY MORNING INSTEAD OF JUST DOING IT?
M: I'M BAD WITH HABITS |
|
| MF007 | 05 | M: (thinking) HEY, I'M NOT THINKING! | |
| MF007 | 06 | M: NEVER LET ANYBODY KNOW YOU DO THIS. THEY'LL CRITICIZE YOU FOR NOT BEING A SAINT OR A SUPERHERO
I: IF YOU WANT TO KEEP IT A SECRET I GOT BAD NEWS |
|
| MF007 | 07 | I: IS THIS YOUR RELIGION OR YOUR HOBBY?
M: ER… |
|
| MF007 | 08 | C: RESISTING THE URGE TO TRY TO MAKE THIS “GOOD”
M: SAME HERE USA pencil. |
|
| MF007 | 09 | I: ARE YOU DOING THIS FOR THE BENEFIT OF ALL BEINGS OR JUST FOR YOUR OWN MENTAL HEALTH?
M: AIN'T I A BEING?! |
|
| MF007 | 10 | M: IF YOU BELIEVE YOU'RE RIGHT, YOU'LL JUSTIFY ALL SORTS OF TERRIBLE THINGS
I: IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE YOU'RE RIGHT, LET OTHER PEOPLE DO ALL SORTS OF TERRIBLE THINGS M: SO ALL ROADS LEAD TO GENOCIDE? |
|
| MF007 | 11 | Flower pot falls on M's head and cracks. | |
| MF007 | 12 | Pages 12 & 13 make a 2-page spread. 8 panels showing a wave made of THOUGHTs breaking inside M's thought bubble. | |
| MF007 | 13 | See above. | |
| MF007 | 14 | I: (looking at a book of OLD SUTRAS) DON'T TAKE THIS STUFF LITERALLY
M: OH I WOULD NEVER (thinking) I'M TOTALLY TAKING IT LITERALLY |
|
| MF007 | 15 | M: THINKING ABOUT THE BAD “POEMS” I WROTE WHEN I WAS 17
I: YOU REMEMBER THEM FONDLY M: THEY WERE TERRIBLE BUT THEY WERE THE BEST OF ME |
|
| MF007 | 16 | M: I MIGHT HAVE REJECTED THE GENDER BINARY WHEN I WAS YOUNG IF I'D KNOWN THAT WAS AN OPTION
I: INSTEAD, YOU FOUND YOUR OWN WAY TO BE A MAN, ONE YOU COULD LIVE WITH. ARE YOU SORRY YOU DID THAT WORK? |
|
| MF007 | 17 | M: I RECKONED WITH MY GENDER BUT MAYBE I'D'VE DONE IT DIFFERENTLY IF I'D HAD EXAMPLES OF OUT NON-BINARY PEOPLE[.] THEY'RE MUCH MORE VISIBLE NOW
I: EVERYONE'S JEALOUS OF THOSE WHO COME AFTER THEM. EVERYONE THINKS KIDS TODAY HAVE IT EASIER |
|
| MF007 | 18 | M: YOU JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT KIND OF PERSON YOU CAN BE UNTIL YOU SEE AN EXAMPLE
I: YOU BE THE EXAMPLE! A MAN WHO'S NOT A NIGHTMARE! |
|
| MF007 | 19 | M: JUST…BEING A MAN IS A MINEFIELD, AND—
I: AND BEING QUEER ISN'T?!!? EXCUSE ME? |
|
| MF007 | 20 | M wears goat horns (2 pair, one going up, one going down) and a goat beard.
I: (angry) ARE YOU TRYING TO OUT-HORN ME? M: IT'S MY FURSONA |
|
| MF007 | 21 | M: EVERYTHING IS PERFECT JUST AS IT IS
I: THAT'S LIKE THE MOST PERVERSE THING YOU'VE EVER SAID |
|
| MF007 | 22 | M & I bow to each other. | |
| MF007 | 23 | Text: M. ELIAS HIEBERT USES THE SAME ART SUPPLIES AS EVERYONE ELSE, AN ANCIENT SCANNER, AND OPEN OFFICE DRAW
MEDITATION FUNNIES IS PRODUCED WITH THE GENEROUS HELP OF THE DOCTOR STEPHEN SANDERS MEMORIAL METAPHYSICAL INSTITUTE |
|
| MF007 | 24 | Text: MeditationFunnies@gmail.com
instagram.com/MeditationFunnies twitter.com/MeditationComix fb.me/MeditationFunnies THIS MAGAZINE IS ALWAYS FREE BUT IF YOU WISH YOU MAY DONATE AT: ko-fi.com/MeditationFunnies |
|
| MF008 | a01 | 8 is a flip book. the a pages read one way and the b pages read the other. They meet in the middle (like the 69 issue of Zap).
Cover. Parody of Garbage Pail Kids Adam Bomb card. MF logo in drippy lettering, PEEL HERE in upper left, 8a in upper right. M's head is exploding. I holds detonator. Bottom: BUDDY Sattva. |
|
| MF008 | a02 | Text: ©MMXXII by M. Elias Hiebert
@MeditationFunnies ON [instagram symbol] & [facebook symbol] @MeditationComix ON THE BIRD APP MeditationFunnies@gmail.com KO-FI.COM/MeditationFunnies IF YOU WANNA DONATE |
|
| MF008 | a03 | I: WAY TO SHOW UP | |
| MF008 | a04 | M: I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TIRED[,] ANGRY[,] SAD I WAS TIL I SAT DOWN | |
| MF008 | a05 | M: (sad face, shakey spiral inside thought bubble)
I: YEAH YEAH YOU'RE FUCKING EVERYTHING UP AND EVERYBODY HATES YOU BLAH BLAH BLAH |
|
| MF008 | a06 | M: (anguished face) SO MANY HUMILIATIONS!
I: SO LITTLE HUMILITY |
|
| MF008 | a07 | M: (thinking) WELL I THOUGHT… WELL I DIDN'T MEAN TO… WELL IT SEEMED LIKE… WELL HE LOOKED LIKE SOMEONE I KNOW…
I: YOU'RE MAKING UP EXCUSES FOR THINGS YOU'LL NEVER NEED EXCUSES FOR |
|
| MF008 | a08 | I: WHAT DO YOU WANT OUT OF THIS?
M: ANNIHILATION … PLEASE |
|
| MF008 | a09 | I: ARE YOU CHASING IT?
M: SOMETIMES |
|
| MF008a | 10 | Cap: “BAD ZAZEN IS THE BEST ZAZEN”—BRAD WARNER
I: DON'T DO IT WELL! |
|
| MF008 | a11 | From off-panel: DINNNG!
M: I MAKE IT THRU I: (rolling their eyes) YOU WANT A PIECE OF CANDY? M: YES |
|
| MF008 | a12 | a12 and b12 make a 2-page spread. I is a one-eyed jack playing card in the middle, a mirror image up and down. Two Ms are on the sides, oriented opposite ways, up and down.
I: WOW MOM (mirror image text) M: (various word balloons, oriented different ways) NO UP[,] NO DOWN[,] NO THOUGHT[,] NO FORM Cap: (APOLOGIES TO RICK GRIFFIN) |
|
| MF008 | b01 | Cover. Identical to other cover except 8b instead of 8a and name at bottom: Awakened ANDY | |
| MF008 | b02 | Text: A lonely place PRODUCTION
MADE POSSIBLE BY THE DOCTOR STEPHEN SANDERS MEMORIAL METAPHYSICAL INSTITUTE PO BOX 200394 DENVER CO 80220 |
|
| MF008 | b03 | I: IS IT A DRUG? | |
| MF008 | b04 | M: HERE THE FUCK I AM
I: (Looking off) WHERE? |
|
| MF008 | b05 | M: (thinking) JUST GET THRU IT[,] JUST GET THRU IT[,] JUST GET THRU IT[,] JUST GET THRU IT[,] JUST GET THRU IT[,] JUST GET THRU IT | |
| MF008 | b06 | I: DOES IT MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER?
M: IT'S LIKE WORKING OUT…I FEEL BAD WHEN I'M DOING IT BUT I FEEL BAD AFTERWARD |
|
| MF008 | b07 | M: (thinking) DON'T GIVE UP[,] DON'T GIVE UP[,] DON'T GIVE UP[,] DON'T GIVE UP[,] DON'T GIVE UP | |
| MF008 | b08 | I: “PAIN IN THE LEGS IS THE TASTE OF ZEN”
M: LEGS, HELL[,] IT'S MY BACK THAT HURTS |
|
| MF008 | b09 | M: (thinking) HALF ASS IS BETTER THAN NO ASS[,] HALF ASS IS BETTER THAN NO ASS[,] HALF ASS IS BETTER THAN NO ASS | |
| MF008 | b10 | M: I RAN OUT OF IDEAS
I: YOU RAN OUT OF IDEAS THAT ARE EASY TO EXECUTE |
|
| MF008b | 11 | I plays solitaire. | |
| MF008b | 12 | b12 and a12 make a 2-page spread. See above. | |
| MF009 | 01 | Cover. M floating in a lava lamp. MF logo. Corner box w/ number, date (JUL-AUG), price (FREE), M icon. Sunburst: STILL ONLY 0¢ I does Kilroy routine. Bottom: lonely place PRODUCTIONS | |
| MF009 | 02 | Text screenshotted from book:
[189] To practice Zen is to sit in zazen.^1 For sitting in zazen a quiet place is good. Prepare a thick sitting mat. Do not allow wind and smoke to enter. Do not allow rain and dew to leak in. Set aside an area that can contain the body. Cap: (SHŌBŌGENZŌ) |
|
| MF009 | 03 | I: STOP SOLVING YOUR PROBLEMS! | |
| MF009 | 04 | M: I MISS EVERY OTHER WORD ANYONE SAYS[,] EVERY OTHER NOTE OF EVERY SONG[,] EVERY OTHER BREATH IN ZAZEN BECAUSE I'M THINKING OF SOMETHING ELSE | |
| MF009 | 05 | I: YOU HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO THAN FEEL ASHAMED OVER STUFF FROM 20 YEARS AGO?
M: OR 30 YEARS AGO[.] OR YESTERDAY |
|
| MF009 | 06 | I: ISN'T THINKING EXHAUSTING?
M: NOT THINKING IS EXHAUSTING TOO |
|
| MF009 | 07 | Empty meditation cushion.
I: YOU'RE NOT GOING TO MAKE ANYTHING BETTER BY NOT DOING IT Y'KNOW! |
|
| MF009 | 08 | M: GENDERFLUID? AGENDER? GENDER2UEER?
I: HOW ABOUT GENDER INDIFFERENT? M: SOMEBODY MAKE THAT FLAG I: YOU CAN'T EXACTLY DESIGN A FLAG TO SHOW HOW MUCH YOU DON'T CARE M: ERR… |
|
| MF009 | 09 | M: SOME PEOPLE READ THIS AND THINK WE'RE ENEMIES
I: FRIENDLY ENEMIES LIKE NATCH & FLAKY M: I THOUGHT WE WERE BEST FRIENDS LIKE CALVIN & HOBBES I: POSSIBLY AN UNHINGED VAUDEVILLE DUO LIKE CHURCHY & ALBERT? M: STAR-CROSSED LOVERS LIKE KRAZY & IGNATZ? |
|
| MF009 | 10 | I takes a bite out of M's thought bubble. | |
| MF009 | 11 | I: SOMEDAY YOU'LL BE A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PERSON[,] AND YOU'LL LOOK BACK ON THESE COMIX AND CRINGE
M: SOMEDAY? |
|
| MF009 | 12 | Pages 12 & 13 make a 2-page spread.
M's large thought bubble is divided into 4: BREATH (a puff of air), BODY (M icon), SURROUNDINGS (a bird singing), SELF (heart) |
|
| MF009 | 13 | Pages 12 & 13 make a 2-page spread.
See above. |
|
| MF009 | 14 | Cap: DREAM. | |
| MF009 | 15 | 13 different size picture frames hanging on a wall.
Cap: MY WALLS ARE COVERED WITH PICTURES |
|
| MF009 | 16 | Cap: A MOUNTAIN LION RUNS AROUND STRAIGHTENING THEM IN A FRENZY
Back view of mountain lion straightening picture with its 2 front paws. |
|
| MF009 | 17 | Cap: SHE HOLDS HER PAW UP NEXT TO EACH ONE, LIKE TO MEASURE IT, CHANTING:
Paw and picture, with M's face. No other part of mountain lion shown. Mountain Lion: IF IT AIN'T PAW STRAIGHT[,] IF IT AIN'T PAW STRAIGHT[,] IF IT AIN'T PAW STRAIGHT[,] IF IT AIN'T PAW STRAIGHT[,] |
|
| MF009 | 18 | M: (discombobulated with agitrons)
I: (into M's ear thru an acoustic megaphone) QUIET! BACK UPRIGHT! KEEP STILL! EARS OVER SHOULDERS! NOSE OVER NAVEL! THINK OF NON-THINKING! |
|
| MF009 | 19 | M: (reading book of OLD SUTRAS) “NEITHER HERE NOR YONDER NOR IN BETWEEN”
I: YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT GENDER AGAIN? |
|
| MF009 | 20 | M: (with plewd) THERE'S POTENTIAL FOR EMBARASSMENT EVERYWHERE
I: SO YOU'D BETTER NEVER DO ANYTHING |
|
| MF009 | 21 | M: REJECT THE BINARY
I: REJECT THE BINARY/NON-BINARY BINARY |
|
| MF009 | 22 | M & I stand with hands in gassho. Pain stars coming from several parts of M's body and several more inside his thought bubble.
Cap: P.O. BOX 200394 DENVER CO 80220 |
|
| MF009 | 23 | Text: SHOUT OUT TO RICK VEITCH. I SAW HIS INTERVIEW IN THE COMIX URINAL AND THOUGHT, OH YEAH, DREAM COMIX. SHOUT OUT TO POSTAL CENTERS USA, THE MONTCLAIR STATION, DICK BLICK, HR MEININGER, SIMPLY PIANO, THE POOPSHEET FOUNDATION, AND THE DOCTOR STEPHEN SANDERS MEMORIAL METAPHYSICAL INSTITUTE ☒ | |
| MF009 | 24 | Text: MEDITATION FUNNIES #9
©MMXXII by M. Elias Hiebert FB[,] GRAM – @MeditationFunnies BIRD – @MeditationComix MeditationFunnies@gmail.com THIS PUBLICATION IS ALWAYS FREE[,] BUT IF YOU WISH YOU MAY DONATE AT ko-fi.com/MeditationFunnies |
|
| MF010 | 01 | Cover. Dalek shouting IMPERMANENCE! IMPERMANENCE! MF logo. Corner box w/ number, date (SEP-OCT), price (FREE), M icon, lonely place PRODUCTIONS | |
| MF010 | 02 | M bows to cushion. | |
| MF010 | 03 | M: I'M DOING IT!
I: YIPPIE |
|
| MF010 | 04 | M: THIS PRACTICE HELPS YOU SEE WHAT'S REALLY GOING ON INSIDE YOUR HEAD[.] THE DIRTY SECRET IS SEEING WHAT'S REALLY GOING ON INSIDE YOUR HEAD CAN BE A REAL BUMMER | |
| MF010 | 05 | I: WHEN DO YOU KNOW YOU'RE IN EXACTLY THE THE RIGHT POSITION?
M: WHEN I FEEL FREE |
|
| MF010 | 06 | I: (beating M with stick) PAY ATTENTION! PAY ATTENTION! | |
| MF010 | 07 | M: (thinking of a triangle labeled a, b, c; a music staff, a pencil, a hyperbola, a finger with a string tied around it, a hand of cards, angles, a dice (die), an open book or possibly a calendar (unclear), a clock, a baseball)
I: DON'T YOU WANT TO TAKE A BREAK FROM ALL THAT THINKING? |
|
| MF010 | 08 | I: AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO BE STRIVING FOR ENLIGHTENMENT?
M: ENLIGHTENMENT CAN TAKE CARE OF ITSELF |
|
| MF010 | 09 | M: WHAT'S THE MOST NOBLE ARTFORM?
I: (reading a minicomic) THE MINICOMIC |
|
| MF010 | 10 | M: IT'S ALL BULLSHIT
I: SAYING IT'S ALL BULLSHIT IS ALSO BULLSHIT |
|
| MF010 | 11 | Cap: YOU CAN'T ESCAPE FROM THE BULLSHIT | |
| MF010 | 12 | Cap: DREAMED MY MON & I WERE ROASTING PEPPERS
Pepper, grate, flame. Cap: AND PEELING OFF THE SKINS Pepper, paring knife, skin. Cap: GOD IF I COULD GO BACK IN TIME AND COOK WITH MY MOTHER AGAIN |
|
| MF010 | 13 | I: AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO FOCUS ON THE PRESENT?
M: (crying) I AM FOCUSED ON THE PRESENT. WHAT'S HAPPENING IN THE PRESENT IS ME BEING SAD ABOUT THE PAST |
|
| MF010 | 14 | Ad for Mom & I.
Mom and I yelling empty word balloons at each other. Text: NEW MINICOMIC: “MOM & I” $1 PAYPAL/VENMO: eliashiebert@comcast.net KO-FI.COM/MeditationFunnies CASH: PO BOX 200394 DENVER CO 80220 OR—DONATE A BUCK TO ANY ABORTION FUND AND LET ME KNOW! *NOT PP ALL SALES DONATED TO: NATIONAL NETWORK OF ABORTION FUNDS |
|
| MF010 | 15 | M: IT'S NOT ONE THING
I: IT'S NOT THE OTHER THING M: IT'S NOT BOTH I: IT'S NOT NEITHER |
|
| MF010 | 16 | M: I DIDN'T DO THE THING RIGHT BECAUSE THEY DISTRACTED ME BY TELLING ME HOW TO DO THE THING RIGHT
I: YUP, THEIR ADVICE IS A RUSE SETTING YOU UP TO FUCK UP SO THEY CAN CORRECT YOU |
|
| MF010 | 17 | M: (surprise line over head)
I: …COURSE, THEY WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO GET YOU WITH THAT ROUTINE IF YOU DIDN'T INSIST ON DOING EVERYTHING RIGHT |
|
| MF010 | 18 | M: NO SPACE OR TIME. THE BIG BANG NEVER HAPPENED.
I: (rolling their eyes) WHEN ARE YOU GONNA GET PAST THIS SMOKEY DORM ROOM SHIT? |
|
| MF010 | 19 | M: THE TROUBLE WITH PROFESSING ANY RELIGION IS PEOPLE WITH NO UNDERSTANDING OF THAT RELIGION WILL JUDGE YOU AGAINST THEIR IDEA OF WHAT IT IS
I: YOU'LL NEVER MEASURE UP TO THEIR INNACURATE [inaccurate] IDEA OF WHAT YOU SHOULD BE |
|
| MF010 | 20 | M: I GET GREAT INSIGHTS WHILE I'M SITTING
I: THEN YOU FORGET THEM M: LIKE A DREAM |
|
| MF010 | 21 | M & I both stand with hands in shashu.
I: (speaking out of the side of their mouth) ARE YOU GONNA TURN THE WRONG WAY AGAIN? M: NO, I THOUGHT OF A MNEMONIC |
|
| MF010 | 22 | Text: PO BOX 200394
DENVER CO 80220 MeditationFunnies@gmail.com instagram.com/MeditationFunnies twitter.com/MeditationComix facebook.com/MeditationFunnies ko-fi.com/MeditationFunnies IF YOU WISH TO DONATE |
|
| MF010 | 23 | Heading: NOW A WORD FROM OUR LAWYER
Snoopy: (wearing a bow tie) (thinking) IPSO FACTO PRIMA FACIE QUID PRO QUO Caption: THESE COMICS ARE NOT INTENDED AS RECCOMENDATIONS [recommendations] OR ADVICE[.] IF YOU'RE INTERESTED IN MEDITATION CONSULT YOUR LOCAL ZEN TEACHER |
|
| MF010 | 24 | Text: MEDITATION FUNNIES #10 ©MMXXII by M. Elias Hiebert
M wearing a long scarf |
|
| MF011 | 01 | Cover. MF logo. Corner box w/ number, date (NOV-DEC), price (FREE), M icon, lonely place PRODUCTIONS. Hands in cosmic mudra with a spiral galaxy inside them. | |
| MF011 | 02 | Typed text: (screenshot from an e-book) When Yaoshan was sitting in meditation, a monastic asked, “What do you think about as you sit in steadfast composure?”
Yaoshan said, “I think not-thinking.” The monastic said, “How do you think not-thinking?” Yaoshan said, “Nonthinking.” Handwritten text: MEDITATION FUNNIES #11 ©MMXXII by M. Elias Hiebert A lonely place PRODUCTION MADE POSSIBLE BY THE STEPHEN SANDERS MEMORIAL METAPHYSICAL INSTITUTE |
|
| MF011 | 03 | M: I'M NOT QUALIFIED TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT MEDITATION
I: (rolling their eyes) YET YOU NEVER SHUT UP |
|
| MF011 | 04 | M: AS LONG AS I'M SITTING HERE AT LEAST I KNOW I'M NOT CAUSING ANY TROUBLE
I: YOU SURE? |
|
| MF011 | 05 | M: (angry eyebrows, wavy spiral in thought bubble)
I: THAT PERSON REALLY GETS TO YOU, HUH? M: YEAH, AND THE THING IS I KNOW THEY'RE BEING AS NICE TO ME AS THEY KNOW HOW TO BE |
|
| MF011 | 06 | I: (grinning) WHAT ARE YOU NONTHINKING ABOUT?
A PENNY FOR YOUR NONTHOUGHTS M: NONTHINK NONTHANK NONTHUNK |
|
| MF011 | 07 | Cap: THE DEMON WHO STOPS YOU FROM FINISHING ANYTHING
Whirlwind demon wraps around M. M: (thinking) IT'S NOT GOOD ENUF I'M NOT GOOD ENUF Cap: OR SHOWING YOURSELF TO ANYONE |
|
| MF011 | 08 | M: EVERY DAY I HAVE TO CONVINCE MYSELF THAT TAKING CARE OF MYSELF ACTUALLY FEELS GOOD
I: (eyes crossed) JUST CUT YR TOENAILS ALREADY! |
|
| MF011 | 09 | I: YOU GET USED TO EVERYTHING SO YOU END UP HAVING TO DO MORE & MORE OF IT
M: LUCK I'M UNDISCIPLINED SO I DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THAT |
|
| MF011 | 10 | I: SILLY LITTLE BAG OF SKIN INFLATING YOUR SILLY LITTLE BAG OF AIR | |
| MF011 | 11 | Text: ONE DAY WHEN I WAS 16 OR 17[,] I WAS TOO DEPRESSED TO GO TO SCHOOL[,] TOO DEPRESSED TO FACE ANYBODY[,] AND I DIDN'T KNOW HOW I WAS GOING TO CONTINUE LIVING[.] I WENT OUT TO THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE[,] SMOKT POT AND READ COMIC BOOKS[.] (IT WAS WHAT KIDS TODAY CALL SELF CARE) | |
| MF011 | 12 | Cap: AND IN A STONED HAZE I HEARD MY HEART WHISPER TO ME
Heart: (whispering) IT'S ALRIGHT Cap: AND THEN I COULD GO ON |
|
| MF011 | 13 | Cap: AND NOW WHEN THINGS ARE HARD[,] I REMEMBER MY HEART WHISPERING TO ME
I CAN STILL HEAR IT M with heart on his chest. |
|
| MF011 | 14 | Ad for Mom & I.
Mom and I yelling empty word balloons at each other. Text: NEW MINICOMIC: “MOM & I” $1 PAYPAL/VENMO: eliashiebert@comcast.net KO-FI.COM/MeditationFunnies CASH: PO BOX 200394 DENVER CO 80220 OR—DONATE A BUCK TO ANY ABORTION FUND AND LET ME KNOW! *NOT PP ALL SALES DONATED TO: NATIONAL NETWORK OF ABORTION FUNDS |
|
| MF011 | 15 | I: ARE YOU KEEPING YOUR MIND STILL?
M: MY MIND IS MUCH TOO BUSY KEEPING MY BODY STILL |
|
| MF011 | 16 | M: IF YOU COMPLIMENT SOMEONE ON SOMETHING, THEY'LL DO MORE OF IT
I: OR LESS, IF THEY'RE PERVERSE M: SO IS A COMPLIMENT JUST A WAY OF CONTROLLING SOMEONE? |
|
| MF011 | 17 | M: WHY DO I AVOID MEDITATING?
I: SAME REASON YOU AVOID SLEEP—YOU'RE AFRAID TO DIE |
|
| MF011 | 18 | I: DOES _____ READ THESE?
M: EH, THEY PROBABLY JUST PUT THEM ON THE “TO READ” PILE FOREVER |
|
| MF011 | 19 | M: (with donkey ears) WHEN WILL I LEARN TO ARGUE WITHOUT BEING AN ASS?
I: (looking away) SCUSE ME WHILE I GO SHOUT INTO A HOLE |
|
| MF011 | 20 | I: (looking up) YOU CAN'T REALLY FLESH OUT AN IDEA IN SINGLE-PANEL FORMAT
M: THAT'S THE BIG ADVANTAGE |
|
| MF011 | 21 | Heading: HAVE U HAD THE BIVALENT BOOSTER YET?
Large bandaid. I: (yelling, cupping hands around mouth) GET IT! M: (top of head peeking up from bottom of panel) PLZ. Cap: VACCINES.GOV |
|
| MF011 | 22 | Text: INSPIRATIONS: LYNDA BARRY AND HER STUDENTS (CHECK OUT @thenearsightedmonkey ON INSTAGRAM)[,] MATT FEAZELL, JOHN PORCELLINO (ALWAYS)[,] KEL CRUM[,] JAMES THURBER, SCHULZ, KEILOR ROBERTS[,] GEO. HERRIMAN (CHECK OUT The Kat Who Walked in Beauty – IF YOU CAN FIND IT!)[,] SAM SZABO (COMICS WILL BREAK YOUR BALLS IS THE FUNNIES COMIC BOOK OF ALL TIME)[,] GABRIELLE BELL, ELEANOR DAVIS (CHECK OUT You & A Bike & A Road)[,] MILT GROSS, EDIE FAKE, SIDNEY SMITH, PHILLIP GUSTON, H. MATISSE, CAT AND GIRL[,] FABIO VISCOGLISI, KENNETH KOCH, JON KLASSEN, THIRTEEN, BMFU, ELIZABETH HAIDE, DON MARTIN, SOFIA FOSTER-DIMINO, OOPS OUT OF ROOM! LOVE, E. | |
| MF011 | 23 | Text: WRITE TO:
PO BOX 200394 DENVER CO 80220 MeditationFunnies@GMAIL.COM [instagram symbol]/[facebook symbol]: @MeditationFunnies BIRD: @MeditationComix THIS MAGAZINE IS ALWAYS FREE BUT IF YOU WISH YOU MAY DONATE AT: ko-fi.com/MeditationFunnies |
|
| MF011 | 24 | Cap: A REAL CONVERSATION WITH A 6 YEAR OLD
6YO: THE EARTH IS REALLY SMALL M: SURE, COMPARED TO THE UNIVERSE THE EARTH IS VERY TINY 6YO: EVEN THE UNIVERSE IS SMALL M: OH YEAH? COMPARED TO WHAT? 6YO: NOTHINGNESS M: (plops) |
|
| MF012 | 01 | Cover.
Psychedelic lettering sort of: MEDITATION FUNNIES #12 JAN-FEB FREE A lonely place PRODUCTION M's head, I's head & torso |
|
| MF012 | 02 | Text: MEDITATION fUNNIES #12 ©MMXXII by M. Elias Hiebert
“A GIFT IS NOT TO BE HATED FOR ITS SMALL VALUE” DŌGEN lonely place PRODUCTIONS |
|
| MF012 | 03 | I: STOP TRYING TO WIN | |
| MF012 | 04 | I: NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU PRACTICE DYING[,] IT WON'T PREPARE YOU FOR THE REAL THING | |
| MF012 | 05 | I: LIFE DOESN'T LAST Y'KNOW
M: MAYBE DEATH DOESN'T LAST EITHER |
|
| MF012 | 06 | Heading: IT DOESN'T LAST
M: (thinks of a heart, money, a sun, a moon, a flower, a house, an erection, an EKG) |
|
| MF012 | 07 | Heading: Panel 1: Two stick figures walk by a creek Panel 2: A duck flies by Panel 3: The stick figures are alone Panel 4: One stick figure says, WHERE HAS IT GONE? |
|
| MF012 | 08 | MF: (eyes wide)
Cap: (large) WHERE HAS IT GONE?? Panel 2: M laughs: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA Panel 3: A hand reaches from off-panel and tweaks M's nose M: (eyes crossed) URF! |
|
| MF012 | 09 | M: (sore nose, tear)
I: YOU TOLD IT WRONG |
|
| MF012 | 10 | THE VERY NOTION OF ARISING & PASSING AWAY IS SUSPECT—KEN TETSUZAN MORGAREIDGE
M next to another M with a skull head |
|
| MF012 | 11 | I: WHAT IS YOUR MIND LIKE WHEN YOU SIT ZAZEN?
M: (speech balloon leading to next page) … |
|
| MF012 | 12 | 12 & 13 are a 2-page spread.
From off-panel: A BLANK PAGE Nothing else on the page |
|
| MF012 | 13 | 12 & 13 are a 2-page spread.
Nothing on the page |
|
| MF012 | 14 | A copy machine.
Arrow pointing to the paper tray: BLANK PAPER Arrow pointing to the pages being printed out: WHERE IS THE BLANK PAPER NOW? I: SO THE ZEEROX [xerox] MACHINE IS A KOAN?? |
|
| MF012 | 15 | I stands on a stack of books: ZEN READER, ZEN MIND, ZEN BODY, ZEN ABS, PATH OF ZEN, PILLARS OF ZEN, HARDCORE ZEN, SPIRITUAL MATERIALISM, JOURNEY OF AWAKENING.
I: WHAT ARE ALL THESE BOOKS FOR? M: JUST TO ENCOURAGE ME TO MEDITATE |
|
| MF012 | 16 | Newspaper: 🎺NEWS🎺
HARD(er) TIMES COMING EVERYTHING IS GETTING WORSE FASCISM! INFLATION! ENVIRONMENTAL CATASTROPHE M: HOW THE HELL ARE WE SUPPOSED TO SURVIVIE? I: (throwing up hands) BY HELPING EACH OTHER OUT!! M: I DUNOW[;] THAT SOUNDS KIND OF SIMPLE I: HAVE YOU EVER TRIED TO HELP SOMEONE OUT? IT'S NEVER SIMPLE |
|
| MF012 | 17 | CHECKING OUT ZEN FORUMS*, BLOGS, VIDEOS, PODCASTS
M face with big smile GETTING EMOTIONALLY INVOLVED IN ZEN FEUDS, DOCTRINAL, DISPUTES, PETTY RESENTMENTS, GENERAL NONSENSE M face with big frown I: STAY OFF THAT INTERNET Footnote: *FORA—ED. |
|
| MF012 | 18 | M: I JUST CAN'T GET OVER IT—SOMEONE IS WRONG ON THE INTERNET
I: BIG DEAL, YOU'RE WRONG ON THE INTERNET AND IN REAL LIFE Chicken: AND IN COMICS |
|
| MF012 | 19 | I: YOU'RE ALWAYS SQUIRMING AROUND LOOKING FOR THE BEST POSITION
M: LIKE A LOVER TRYING TO HIT THE RIGHT SPOT |
|
| MF012 | 20 | I: WHAT'S THE POINT OF DOING THIS?
M: WHAT'S THE POINT OF DOING ANYTHING ELSE? Cap: APOLOGIES TO KŌDŌ SAWAKI |
|
| MF012 | 21 | M & I bow to each other | |
| MF012 | 22 | Text: SOCIAL MEDIA SHAKEDOWN
SINCE CAPTAIN APARTHEID BLEW UP TWITTER[,] EVERYONE'S LOOKING FOR NEW PLATFORMS[.] @MeditationFunnies CAN NOW BE FOUND AT COUNTER SOCIAL & COHOST AND HOPEFULLY SOON THE MUSHROOM PROJECT AS WELL AS FACEBOOK, INSTAGRAM AND GMAIL @MeditationComix IS STILL ON TWITTER TIL THE BITTER END! PS DONATE AT ko-Fi.com/MeditationFunnies IF YOU WANT TO |
|
| MF012 | 23 | Text: …OR YOU CAN ALWAYS CONTACT US AT THE MONTCLAIR STATION*
PO BOX 200394 DENVER CO 80220 (SEND TRADES!) Footnote: *THAT'S MY LOCAL POST OFFICE, YA DORKS! SPECIAL THANKS TO THE STEPHEN SANDERS MEMORIAL METAPHYSICAL INSTITUTE |
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| MF012 | 24 | Ad for Mom & I.
Mom and I yelling empty word balloons at each other. Text: NEW MINICOMIC: “MOM & I” $1 PAYPAL/VENMO: eliashiebert@comcast.net KO-FI.COM/MeditationFunnies CASH: PO BOX 200394 DENVER CO 80220 OR—DONATE A BUCK TO ANY ABORTION FUND AND LET ME KNOW! *NOT PP ALL SALES DONATED TO: NATIONAL NETWORK OF ABORTION FUNDS |
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| MF013 | 01 | MEDITATION FUNNIES
MAR-APR, hand holding up one finger, hand holding up three fingers, FREE lonely place PRODUCTIONS |
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| MF013 | 02 | Epigraph from Ānāpānasati Sutta (“A monk, o Monks, goes into a forest, or to the foot of a great tree, or to a lonely place, and there sits down, cross-legged, holding his body upright, and practices Introspection. “He breathes in attentively, and attentively breathes out. Drawing in a long breath, he knows: ‘I drawing in a long breath,’ exhaling a long breath, he knows: ‘I am exhaling a long breath.’ Drawing in a short breath, he knows: ‘I am drawing in a short breath,’ exhaling a short breath, he knows: ‘I am exhaling a short breath.’) | |
| MF013 | 03 | I: WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO HERE?
M: I'M TRYING TO SIT UP STRAIGHT |
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| MF013 | 04 | M holds several thought bubbles on strings, like helium balloons. They say IDEA and THOUGHT.
I: ARN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO LET GO? M: NO I'M HOLDING ON TIGHT TO THESE |
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| MF013 | 05 | Inside M's belly are squggles and wavy lines and the words INNER TURMOIL written in a spiral.
I: DID YOU GET IN A FIGHT ON TWITTER AGAIN? ARE YOU MISSING ISSUE 14 OF YOUR FAVORITE COMICAL BOOK? DID YOU STUB YOUR TOE? LOSE A GLOVE? |
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| MF013 | 06 | I: (goofy face) WHAT MYSTICAL POWERS HAS YOUR PRACTICE GIVEN YOU?
M: THE UNCANNY ABILITY TO ACCEPT THINGS AS THEY ARE |
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| MF013 | 07 | I: (skeptical) REEEALLY?
M: IT COMES AND GOES |
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| MF013 | 08 | I: (grinning) “BE HERE NOW”
M: WHEN AND WHERE THE FUCK IS THAT??? |
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| MF013 | 09 | M: I MAKE LITTLE MISTAKES BUT I DESERVE SOME SLACK! I DESERVE COMPASSION! I DESERVE PATIENCE & UNDERSTANDING!
I: (eyes wide, holding up their hands in front of them) TAKE IT EASY NO ONE ISN'T GIVING YOU THAT HERE |
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| MF013 | 10 | M, cringing, thinks, OOH WHAT AN EMBARRASSING THOUGHT
I: (throwing up hands, exasperated) HOW CAN YOU BE EMBARRASSED WHEN YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE HERE?? |
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| MF013 | 11 | I: (holding hand in front of mouth) ...YOU KNOW I'M *YOU*, RIGHT? | |
| MF013 | 12 | M: Large thought bubble filled with squiggles in vaguely outline format, with some crossed out, some with brackets and arrows
I: (looking at thought bubble) SHOW YOUR WORK. |
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| MF013 | 13 | USA pencil draws M's leg.
I: (standing on pencil) YOU KNOW DRAING IT ISN'T THE SAME AS DOING IT , RIGHT? Cartoonist: GRRR... |
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| MF013 | 14 | M: Thought bubble full of THOUGHT THOUGHT THOUGHT etc in different directions
I, teeth gritted, pushes another THOUGHT into the bubble M: STOP! THERE'S NO MORE ROOM! |
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| MF013 | 15 | The top of M's head flips up and a brain with legs & eyes jumps out (after Julia Wertz's _Drinking At The Movies_)
Brain: I'M OUTTA HERE Cap: APOLOGIES TO JULIA WERTZ |
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| MF013 | 16 | Panel 1: An oval with eyes floats above M.
Cap: YOU CAN WATCH YOURSELF Panel 2: Two ovals with eyes float above M. Cap: OR YOU CAN WATCH YOURSELF WATCHING YOURSELF |
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| MF013 | 17 | Panel 1: Many ovals with eyes all facing different directions.
Cap: YOU CAN CREATE AS MANY WATCHERS AS YOU LIKE Panel 2: M: WHO WATCHES THE WATCHERS OF THE WATCHERS OF... I: (holding a comic with the pages folded back) PLEASE, I'M TRYING TO READ A PIRATE COMIC Smiley face after Watchmen |
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| MF013 | 18 | Panel 1: Cap: FIRST CLEAN
M sweeps up. Panel 2: Cap: THEN ZAZEN M sits. Cap: ---SHUNRYŪ SUZUKI |
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| MF013 | 19 | M: SOMETIMES THE SILENCE IN THE ZENDO IS CRUSHING
Arrow pointing to next page → |
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| MF013 | 20 | 4 speech balloons from offstage, one on each side of the panel: BREATHE
M: OTHER TIMES... |
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| MF013 | 21 | Cap: ZAZENKAI (ALL-DAY SITTING)
M: (thinking) IN TWO HOURS I GET TO HAVE TEA IN TWO HOURS I GET TO HAVE TEA IN TWO HOURS I GET TO HAVE TEA |
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| MF013 | 22 | I: YOU'VE BEEN AT THIS AWHILE, HUH?
M: YUP. I: NORMALLY YOU GET BORED WITH STUFF WAY FASTER M: ER, I, UH... |
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| MF013 | 23 | USA pencil draws I's foot.
I: (looking at Cartoonist) OF COURSE I WAS TALKING ABOUT MEDITATION *AND* THE COMIC Cartoonist: I KNOW. I'M SURPRISED I COULD KEEP IT UP THIS LONG |
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| MF013 | 24 | Two speech balloons coming from off-panel, on the left side. M has one giant ear, his right, like, the one towards the speech balloons. | |
| MF013 | 25 | Stack of books; (top to bottom) ZEN READER, ZEN MIND, ZEN BODY, ZEN ABS, PATH OF ZEN, PILLARS OF ZEN, HARDCORE ZEN, SPIRITUAL MATERIALISM, JOURNEY OF AWAKENING. I stands on top and bends over to look at them.
I: WHAT ARE ALL THESE BOOKS FOR? M: JUST TO ENCOURAGE ME TO MEDITATE |
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| MF013 | 26 | M: IF YOU TELL PEOPLE YOU MEDITATE, THEY ALWAYS SAY SOMETHING ABOUT HOW THEY CAN'T MEDITATE
I: (shrugging) GOOD THING YOU DON'T HAVE TO M: (yelling) YOU DON'T HAVE TO! |
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| MF013 | 27 | M: IT'S LIKE WHEN YOU TELL PEOPLE YOU DON'T DRINK. THEY ALWAYS SAY THEY SHOULD STOP OF THEY WON'T STOP
MY NOT DRINKING ISN'T ABOUT YOU! I, eyes half closed, holds a cocktail with an umbrella in it. |
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| MF013 | 28 | I: ARE YOU DOING IT FOR THE RIGHT REASON?
M: I DON'T THINK THE PRACTICE CARES WHAT YOUR REASON IS |
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| MF013 | 29 | I: (yelling) STOP SQUIRMING! | |
| MF013 | 30 | M & I bow to each other. | |
| MF013 | 31 | SHOUT OUT TO POSTAL CENTERS USA IN MAYFAIR, DENVER FOR BEING MY FRIENS AND ALWAYS GIVING ME A GOOD DEAL ON COPIES
SHOUT OUT TO DONUTS TOWN ON EVANS & MONACO IN DENVER FOR ALWAYS GIVING ME AN EXTRA WHEN I BUY ONE AS ALWAYS, SHOUT OUT TO THE DOCTOR STEPHEN SANDERS MEMORIAL METAPHYSICAL INSTITUTE |
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| MF013 | 32 | MEDITATION FUNNIES #13
©MMXXIII by /M. Elias Hiebert/ A lonely place PRODUCTION PO BOX 200394 DENVER CO 80220 MeditationFunnies@gmail.com @MeditationFunnies ON SOCIALS OLD & NEW FB, COHOST, COUNTER SOCIAL, TUMBLR, MSTDN.PARTH BUT MOSTLY INSTAGRAM @MeditationComix ON TWITTER DONATE AT ko-fi.com/MeditationFunnies OR DON'T! OR DO! |
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| MF014 | 01 | MF logo. Corner box: #14, MAY-JUN, FREE, M icon, lonely place PRODUCTIONS. I reclines inside a cosmic mudra. | MF014 | 02 | M bows to cushion. |
| MF014 | 03 | I: EXHAUST YOURSELF | |
| MF014 | 04 | M: WATCHING MY BREATH CYCLE
WATCHING MY THOUGHTS ARISE I: WATCHING YOUR FOOT FALL ASLEEP |
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| MF014 | 05 | M: FOR THE NEXT 30 MINUTES...IF I HAVE A THOUGHT[,] I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO SIT HERE AND THINK IT[.] IF I HAVE A FEELING[,] I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO SIT HERE AND FEEL IT[.] IF THERE IS A NOISE[,] I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO SIT HERE AND HEAR IT
I: YOU CAN ALWAYS DECIDE TO GET UP YOU KNOW |
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| MF014 | 06 | I: ARE YOU REALLY WORRIED OTHER PEOPLE WILL THINK YOUR PRACTICE ISN'T VALID? | |
| MF014 | 07 | M: (thinking) DON'T BE ATTACHED TO DUALITY
DON'T BE ATTACHED TO NON-DUALITY DON'T BE ATTACHED TO NOT BEING ATTACHED I: WHAT A FUCKIN TIGHTROPE |
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| MF014 | 08 | M: (thinking) WHAT AM I DOING? WHAT AM I DOING? WHAT AM I DOING? | |
| MF014 | 09 | I: WHY DID YOU CREATE ME ANYWAY?
M: YOU KEEP ME FROM GETTING POMPOUS AND SOMEHOW YOUR MAKING FUN OF MY PRACTICE MAKES ME WANT TO PRACTICE MORE |
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| MF014 | 10 | I: WHY DID YOU CREATE ME ANYWAY?
M: EVERY COMIC BOOK SUPERHERO NEEDS A BOY SIDEKICK I: NOT A BOY, DUDE |
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| MF014 | 11 | M: SOMETIMES I'M SURPRISED TO FIND I'M NOT MISERABLE | |
| MF014 | 12 | Cap: I SKIPPED A DAY AND IT FELT LIKE I SKIPPED A WEEK | |
| MF014 | 13 | USA pencil draws I's leg.
I: WHY ISN'T THIS A WEBCOMIC? Cartoonist: WEBCOMICS ALWAYS HAVE EXTRA, HIDDEN JOKES. I CAN'T WRITE ALL THAT I: MOST OF THE TIME YOU CAN'T WRITE *ONE* |
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| MF014 | 14 | A pile of thought bubbles that say THOUGHT are in front of, obscuring, M. | |
| MF014 | 15 | I holds a stand-up fan which blows the thought bubbles away, revealing M. | |
| MF014 | 16 | Two page spread. M thinks of a castle which gradually turns into vertical dashed lines.
I: YOU GO THRU A LOT OF FANTASY ROUTINES WHEN YOU'RE SITTING THERE BUT EVENTUALLY THEY DISSOLVE |
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| MF014 | 17 | Second page of two-page spread, described above. | |
| MF014 | 18 | NEW MIXTAPE!
(outline letters) “BOO-HOO” JUST A FEW SONGS THAT COMFORTED ME AS I MOURNED A LITTLE OLD LADY WHO WOULDN'T LIKE MOST OF 'EM DOWNLOAD AT (typewritten text) spideroak.com/browse/share/eliashiebert/tapes OR SCAN HERE (arrow pointing to QR code) |
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| MF014 | 19 | PASSWORD: (typewritten) hoaryhandsofhoggoth
ALSO AVAILABLE ON CD (CD icon) OR USB DRIVE (USB drive icon) I KNOW YOU'D RATHER HAVE A SPOTIFY PLAYLIST OR WHATEVER BUT I CAN'T DO THAT IF YOU CAN'T DOWNLOAD & PLAY AN MP3 I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO TELL YOU! ANNOTATED TRACKLIST AT: MIXLOG.BLOGSPOT.COM CONTENT NOTE: CONTAINS SONGS BY ONE COVID DENIER & ONE NAZI |
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| MF014 | 20 | M: LENGTHY EXPLANATION LENGTHY EXPLANATION LENGTHY EXPLANATION (etc)
I's word balloons appear in front of M's: OK OK BUT M: THAT'S WHY I'M JUSTIFIED IN DOING WHAT I DID I: NOBODY CARES! |
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| MF014 | 21 | M's head floats away from his body.
I: (yelling, cupping hand over mouth) COME BACK! |
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| MF014 | 22 | I: SOMEONE ONCE TOLD ME ALL AN ARTIST CAN DO IS DESCRIBE WHAT'S IN FRONT OF THEIR EYES
M: ALL THAT'S IN FRONT OF MY EYES IS THIS DAMN WALL |
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| MF014 | 23 | I: SO YOU JUST SIT HERE FOR HALF AND HOUR AND ALL YOUR PROBLEMS ARE SOLVED?
M: EH, IT MIGHT TAKE AN HOUR |
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| MF014 | 24 | Small pictures of M doing various activities, labeled DRAW DRAW DRAW, TYPE TYPE TYPE (typing on a laptop), WALK WALK WALK, FUCK FUCK FUCK (couple under a blanket with a heart), READ READ READ, THINK THINK THINK (chin in hand, looking into the distance), EXERCISE EXERCISE EXERCISE (doing a pushup, RRRRR), TALK TALK TALK (talking to another head, both in profile, YAK YAK). Cap: THERE IS NO SUBSTITUTE | |
| MF014 | 25 | Cap: FOR MEDITATION
AND DON'T YOU FORGET IT! |
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| MF014 | 26 | M: I THINK SOMEONE CAME UP WITH “GOALLESS PRACTICE” SO YOU DON'T GET HUNG UP ON ACHIEVING THE GOAL
Small meditating person with plewds (sweat beads): OH NO! I LOST MY CONCENTRATION I'M SUPPOSED TO BE GETTING ENLIGHTENED! M: ...INSTEAD YOU GET HUNG UP ON NOT HAVING A GOAL Small meditating person with plewds (sweat beads): OH NO! I TRIED TO GET ENLIGHTENED! I'M SUPPOSED TO HAVE NO GOAL! OH NO! I'M GETTING SOMETHING OUT OF THIS! IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE USELES |
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| MF014 | 27 | Cap: WATCH YOUR BREATH LIKE A MOTHER BIRD
APOLOGIES TO LAO TZU AND UNCLE ALEISTER |
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| MF014 | 28 | I: DON'T SIT UP TOO STRAIGHT OR YOU'LL GET PROUD | |
| MF014 | 29 | I: HOW LONG ARE YOU GOING TO SIT THERE AND LOOK AT YOUR WORRIES AND SELF-DOUBTS?
M: UNTIL THEY BECOME BORING |
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| MF014 | 30 | M & I bow to each other | |
| MF014 | 31 | _M. ELIAS HIEBERT_ FINALLY STARTED DRAWING WITH BLUE PENCIL LIKE EVERYBODY SAYS TO
ALL ISSUES OF _MEDITATION FUNNIES_ ARE AVAILABLE FREE BY MAIL (INQUIRE BY SOCIAL MEDIA, EMAIL OR POST) OR AT THE EAST COLFAX FREE BOOKSTORE, 7935 E 14th Av. IN DENVER, OPEN SATURDAYS 4--6 WRITE TO MeditationFunnies@gmail.com |
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| MF014 | 32 | MED FUN NUMBER FOURTEEN
©MMXXIII BY /M. Elias Hiebert/ PO BOX 200394 / DENVER CO 80220 ALWAYS FREE BUT DONATE IF YOU WISH ko-fi.com/MeditationFunnies HIT UP @MeditationFunnies ON INSTAGRAM (COUNTERSOCIAL, TUMBLR, COHOST, FB, MSTDN.PARTY) @MeditationComix ON TWITTAH THANX TO JEN RUNTY FOR MANUFACTURING ASSISTANCE ON #s 13&14 THANKS AS ALWAYS TO THE GOOD DOCTOR STEPHEN SANDERS & THE MEMORIAL METAPHYSICAL INSTITUTE _an indefinite article_, A PAGE OF TYPEWRITING IS AVAILABLE FOR A SASE |
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| MF015 | 01 | MF logo; the T is a lag screw, screwing down into the top of M's head.
JUL-AUG FREE (large) #15 lonely place PRODUCTIONS |
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| MF015 | 02 | “DON'T MISS THE OPPORTUNITY TO ADD EVEN A SINGLE SPECK ATOP THE MOUNTAIN OF GOOD DEEDS”
---DŌGEN MEDITATION FUNNIES #15 ©MMXXIII by /M. Elias Hiebert/ T.D.S.S.M.M.I. |
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| MF015 | 03 | I: HEY, DO YOU THINK IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO ADVERTIZE A MIXTAPE WITH AN OLD (KAN)YE SONG ON IT, AND IDENTIFY HIM ONLY AS A “NAZI” WITH NO FURTHER EXPLANATION?
Cartoonist: NO. THAT PROBABLY MADE SOME PEOPLE CONFUSED OR WORSE. I'M SORRY. WHETHER PEOPLE LIKE YE'S MUSIC OR NOT, THIS NAZI SHIT IS NO JOKE |
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| MF015 | 04 | Empty cushion. I stands with hands on hips.
M: (yelling from off-panel) I DON'T WANNA! |
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| MF015 | 05 | M: SITTING HERE, SOMETIMES I HAVE SYMPATHY FOR MYSELF[,] SOMETIMES I JUST HAVE CRITICISM OF MYSELF
I: WELL, YOU CAN HAVE SYMPATHY FOR THE CRITIC |
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| MF015 | 06 | I: (yelling) STOP TRYING TO BE A BETTER PERSON! | |
| MF015 | 07 | I: (grinning) LOOK AT YOU, TRYING TO ACCEPT THINGS AS THEY ARE | |
| MF015 | 08 | I: YOU DON'T GET A MEDAL FOR DOING WHAT YOU'RE *SUPPOSED* TO DO, Y'KNOW
M: THAT'S NOT TRUE. I CAN GIVE MYSELF AS MANY LITTLE MEDALS AS I WANT |
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| MF015 | 09 | M: SOMEONE ONCE TOLD ME IT'S RUDE TO POKE AROUND IN SOMEONE ELSE'S UNCONSCIOUS MIND UNINVITED
I: (falling backwards, throwing up hands) *UNINVITED??* I WAS BORN THERE BUDDY |
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| MF015 | 10 | I: (reading book of DOGEN) “ZAZEN IS ONLY THE DHARMA GATE OF JOY AND EASE”
M: ALL THIS JOY AND EASE IS KILLING ME |
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| MF015 | 11 | M: YOU DON'T HAVE TO GET HUNG UP ON ENLIGHTENMENT[.] ONE SCHOOL OF THOUGHT SEZ SITTING IN THE PROPER POSTURE IS ITSELF ENLIGHTENMENT
I: NOW YOU CAN GET HUNG UP ON POSTURE! M: (thinking) IS DIS DA PROPAH POSTCHUH? |
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| MF015 | 12 | Cap: MEDITATE ENUF THAT YOU GET BORED WITH YOUR OWN BULLSHIT | |
| MF015 | 13 | M: I CAN SAY ANYTHING IN THESE COMIX[,] HOWEVER IGNORANT[,] ARROGANT[,] MISGUIDED[,] SAPPY...
I: BECAUSE YOU ALWAYS HAVE ME HERE TO DEFLATE YOU |
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| MF015 | 14 | Coffee cups stacked up all around M.
I: YOU AREN'T BY ANY CHANCE SELF-MEDICATING? |
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| MF015 | 15 | I: WHAT'S THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN THOUGHTS AND WORDS
M: CAN'T SAY |
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| MF015 | 16 | I: WHAT'S THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN THOUGHT & WORDS?
M: THOUGHTS ARE THE BUTTERFLIES WORDS ARE THE PINS |
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| MF015 | 17 | I: (holding up hands, backing away) YOU'RE A LITTLE RAMBUNCTIOUS TODAY
The top of M's head is flipped open, exposing his brain which has a swirl, a lightning bolt, and agitrons over it. M: I GOT A ITCHY BRAIN!! |
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| MF015 | 18 | M has a raincloud over him and is surrounded by a broken egg, a kite in a tree, a sweater with moths, an apple with a worm, a spilled bottle. | |
| MF015 | 19 | I: (strumming a guitar) YOU BALANCE ON YOUR CUSHION LIKE A MATTRESS BALANCES ON A BOTTLE OF WINE | |
| MF015 | 20 | M: WHAT WAS YOUR FACE BEFORE YOUR PARENTS WERE BORN?
I: HOW MANY FEATHERS ON A PERDUE CHICKEN? M: DOES A DOG HAVE BUDDHA NATURE? I: WHAT DOES TUCH EHT LLEH PU MEAN? M & I: HOW MANY TIMES DID THE BATMOBILE CATCH A FLAT?? |
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| MF015 | 21 | Inside a thought bubble, a diagram of breath going thru a tube.
M: (smiling, looking up at thought bubble) WHEN I WAS MEDITATING I FELT LIKE MY BODY WAS A HOLLOW PIPE Inside another thought bubble, a diagram of thought going thru a tube. M: I FELT LIKE MY MIND WAS A HOLLOW PIPE TOO I: (hand over mouth) *YAWN* ANOTHER GREAT INSIGHT |
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| MF015 | 22 | M: Eyes wide, plewds (sweat beads), one pupil dialated.
Arrow pointing off panel UNIDENTIFIABLE REPEATING NOISE |
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| MF015 | 23 | M: One plewd (sweat bead)
I: (angry eyebrows) DONT SNEEZE[,] DON'T COUGH[,] DON'T SWALLOW[,] DON'T YAWN[,] DON'T CLOSE YER EYES[,] DON'T FALL OVER[,] DON'T SHIFT AROUND |
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| MF015 | 24 | M: SOMETIMES MY BREATH FEELS LIKE WAVES ON A BEACH FAR AWAY
I surfs a wave in the background |
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| MF015 | 25 | Panel 1: Cap: I BOW TO MY CUSHION
M bows to cushion, facing away from sun in background Panel 2: Cap: I BOW TO THE WORLD M bows facing away from cushion toward sun in background Panel 3: Cap: I SIT ON MY CUSHION M sits on cushion facing away from sun in background. Arrow pointing toward panel border in front of him: WALL Panel 4: Cap: I STAND UP AND...LOOK! THERE'S THE WORLD AGAIN M stands with suprise line over head (I don't think Mort Walker made up a name for this one), wide eyes, and hands in gassho facing away from cushion toward sun in background |
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| MF015 | 26 | Student: DILEMMA.
Teacher, with whisk (hossu): THERE IS NO WAY I AM GOING TO RESOLVE THIS DILEMMA FOR YOU. GET BENT! Teacher, with whisk (hossu): YOU WON'T EVEN GET ME TO ADMIT IT *IS* A DILEMMA |
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| MF015 | 27 | M: IF YOU NEVER MAKE A JUDGEMENT THAT ONE THING IS BETTER THAN ANOTHER
I: THEN YOU CAN'T BE HARMED Cap: APOLOGIES TO SHENG YEN AND UNCLE ALEISTER |
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| MF015 | 28 | M: I LIKE TO USE “GOD” AS SHORTHAND FOR THE FORCE OF NATURE, THE LAWS OF THE UNIVERSE, THE BIG *IT*...BUT SOME PEOPLE REALLY CRINGE WHEN I SAY IT
I: (yelling) LUCKY YOU, YOU CAN STAND TO HEAR THE WORD BECAUSE YOU WEREN'T *ABUSED* IN GOD'S NAME! |
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| MF015 | 29 | M: thinks PANIC in huge letters
I: scared, surprise line over head, mouth wide |
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| MF015 | 30 | WHERE TO GET INSTRUCTIONS FOR MEDITATION (NOT IN THIS COMIC BOOK -- THAT'S FER SURE
1. FIND A LIVING TEACHER! IN YR HOMETOWN OR ON ZOOM JUST TAKES A LITTLE RESEARCH 2. _DŌGEN'S FUKANZAZENGI -- THE CLASSIC! NUMEROUS TRANSLATIONS ONLINE 3. _ĀNĀPĀNASATI SUTRA_ OR “118th DISCOURSE” ONLINE OR IN “A BUDDHIST BIBLE” BY GODDARD VERY REPETITIVE---OLD INDIAN SUTRAS ARE LIKE THAT 4. _THE 3 PILLARS OF ZEN_ BY KAPLAU HAS GOOD STUFF ON POSTURE IN THE BACK, INCLUDING TROUBLESHOOTING TIPS---WITH PICTURES! |
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| MF015 | 31 | PO BOX 200394 / DENVER CO 80220
MeditationFunnies@gmail.com @MeditationFunnies ON [facebook f logo] [Instagram camera logo] [tumblr t logo] AND THE REST OF THEM COHOST, COUNTERSOCIAL NOT BLUE SKY YET @MEDITATIONFUNNIES@MSTDN.PARTY DONATE AT ko-fi.com/MeditationFunnies OR DON'T OR DO |
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| MF015 | 32 | M: DO YOU THINK IN WORDS?
Child: NO. M: WHAT THEN? IMAGES? Child: NO. THOUGHTS. M plops, exposing (hard) soles of shoes |
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| MF016 | 01 | MF logo. Corner box: #16, FREE, SEP-OCT. M wearing BE A MEDIUM PERSON T-shirt. lonely place PRODUCTIONS | |
| MF016 | 02 | M stands in front of his cushion.
M: HELLO, CUSHION. Cushion: IT'S BEEN AWHILE. |
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| MF016 | 03 | M: AAAAH[,] I FORGOT HOW GOOD THIS FEELS | |
| MF016 | 04 | I: DO YOU TAKE THIS WITH YOU INTO THE REST OF THE DAY?
M: THAT PART IS HARD |
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| MF016 | 05 | M: SITTING ZAZEN...IT'S THE ONLY TIME I DON'T FEEL LIKE I'M DOING SOMETHING WRONG
I: AS SOON AS YOU STAND UP, YOU'RE CONVINCED YOU'RE FUCKING UP |
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| MF016 | 06 | Cap: ALL ARTS ARE FUNDAMENTALLY EMBARRASSING
M writes with a quill /Roses are.../, thinks; dances ballet sort of; paints a sun, tongue hanging out; sings a sour note. Cap: (BUT UNFORTUNATELY NECESSARY FOR SURVIVAL) |
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| MF016 | 07 | I: (alone) ALL HUMAN ACTIVITY IS EMBARRASSING IF YOU ASK ME | |
| MF016 | 08 | I: DO YOU STOP YOURSELF FROM THINKING? | M: IT'S MORE LIKE...I REALIZE I DON'T HAVE TO |
| MF016 | 09 | I: DON'T HAVE TO WHAT? THINK, OR STOP YOURSELF?
M: ... |
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| MF016 | 10 | I: (lounging, chin in hand) AREN'T YOU BORED WITH YOURSELF YET?
M: I'M FASCINATED WITH MYSELF. I'M BORED WITH EVERYONE ELSE. |
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| MF016 | 11 | From off-panel: NOISE
M: (thinking) DON'T NOISE THE NOISE |
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| MF016 | 12 | Panel 1: Bald little guy walks along thinking I'M GONNA DO SOMETHING WRONG AND SOMEONE'S GONNA YELL AT ME
Panel 2: Bald little guy continues walking, still thinking I'M GONNA DO SOMETHING WRONG AND SOMEONE'S GONNA YELL AT ME, looking behind him not seeing the spikey-haired little guy with one strand of hair in front of his face walking the other way. Panel 3: Bald little guy rages out: HEY! YA GOING THE WRONG WAY YA [grawlix] |